The Pope, the Dalai Lama, and doing what you really want

I saw an article last week saying that the Pope met with that Kim Davis lady before he left the US but he decided not to meet with the Dalai Lama, because of concerns about what China might do in response. Really?

Well, I don’t really care about Kim Davis, but the whole – he’s not going to meet with the Dalai Lama thing got me thinking…

I mean, it’s the Pope, and the Dalai Lama. Two pretty big deal dudes.

I would think that if the Pope wants to have communication with someone, he would have it, and no one is going to intimidate him out of it. But that story was a great example of someone feeling that they couldn’t have something out of concern – or fear – of what someone else would think, how they would respond, or how they might react, in response.

Can you imagine feeling like you couldn’t even have a certain kind of communication with someone, even a discussion, because of what someone might do?

You probably just thought to yourself – no way, I do what I want. Except it actually happens to us all the time.

This was a great reminder for myself about being more aware of aspects of my own life where I might hold back, make myself smaller, try to fit in as opposed to standing out, or adjust myself into someone else’s comfort zone, in order to avoid some perceived {imagined} possibility of what might happen if I do something else.

But that thinking of ‘what they will do if‘ isn’t even real.

Sometimes I put together design ideas and then I start to think – is this too much? What if my client doesn’t like it? Will they think I’m no good?

Sometimes I come across a house for a client that isn’t quite what we’ve been looking at so far and I’m a little hesitant to suggest it… what if they hate it? Will they stop working with me?

Sometimes I put on an outfit that looks amazing (I mean, I’m just saying) but then I think – is this too much? Is it overboard or too dressy or too…. whatever… and maybe adjust down a little – play it a little safer.

Sometimes I go to tell someone how I feel about them and then hold back, feeling fear that maybe they’ll be uncomfortable or they won’t feel the same way, and my being open and vulnerable will be invalidated.

But here’s the truth. Having more communication is awesome. Having what’s right for you is even more awesome.

Having a home that is 1000% unapologetically you is going to be the best feeling space ever.

Rocking the ‘too much’ outfit is actually ‘just right’. Even if it might be too much for someone else.

Even if you don’t feel like you are using the most poetic words, telling someone you care about how you feel will sound beautiful to them, and will feel empowering and validating for you.

So these days when I even start to second guess myself or hesitate, I don’t pump the brakes to make sure everyone else is comfortable – I push on the gas. And I hope you do too {even if the poor Pope can’t} :)

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