I have no style… and it’s costing me.

Piles of clothes

I wrote a while back that I was starting a big purge of my space… then I moved so it all got put on hold and much to my frustration I ended up packing and moving a lot of things I will end up getting rid of. But as I unpack the purging continues, one thing I’m thinking about a lot as I go through and unpack the seemingly endless pile of boxes is how much I don’t want to do this ever again!

The one area of my space that I’m the most frustrated with is my closet. I don’t think I’ve ever had a very strong sense of style. It’s not that I look horrible, or tacky, I have nice enough clothes, but I typically tend to buy things that I find on sale throughout the year, and they are probably more a reflection of my mood, or a vision of part of an outfit {the other parts of said outfit might never show up in my closet}, and not really a larger vision of a style overall. So in the end I just have a bunch of random stuff, some of it I don’t ever wear because I don’t have the rest of the outfit, some of it I love the idea of but it doesn’t really fit my lifestyle, some of it I love as a piece of clothing but I don’t really love the way I look or feel in it. Not exactly a recipe for success.

Even after giving away a lot of clothes before moving, I still have a closet full of things I’ve accumulated with no real intention, I’m not sure I love any of them, and I really only wear a small number of items consistently.

A couple of years ago I discovered Mint.com. Sometimes I use it more than others, but one thing that I love about it is that you can look at your spending habits over time, and you can also see how much you spend in a certain category over say, an entire year. Talk about a wake up call.

I might have felt like I didn’t have a lot of money to spend on clothes and that was why I always shopped on sale and maybe my closet wasn’t more cohesive, but I was really surprised when I looked at what I had spent on clothing for an entire year. Really?! That number can’t be right!


I’m not going to tell you what the number was, because it’s not actually important. Whether it was just $1,000, or $15,000, what I realized was that for the money I spent, I didn’t feel like I had added a lot of value to my style or wardrobe overall. And if I had that money all at once to spend, or if I knew that I was going to spend that at the beginning of the year and had planned with more intention, I knew 100% that I wouldn’t have used it the same way.

When it comes to designing a space, I don’t struggle with this nearly as much. I’m able to develop a vision of what I want to create, and hone in on the things that will work with that vision and elevate it, and easily pass on things that don’t. I need to translate that into my style!

So I’m taking a new approach to re-owning my style and setting a new tone in this area of my life. First, I’m going to take a couple of months and not buy anything. Not one single thing. I’m thinking of it as a palette cleanser to reset everything and get out of auto-pilot shopping behaviors and habits.


I’m also spending a little time finding images of styles and outfits that I love and am naturally drawn to. One key thing I’m realizing is that I need to be able to distinguish between images that I might be drawn to because they are a beautifully styled/photographed image, and actual outfits that I am liking. Also, really thinking with intention about whether the images I’m saving as inspiration are practical for my lifestyle. Is developing a style and wardrobe full of stiletto heels really going to be practical for day long outings with buyers where we are in and out of the car and up and down stairs for hours at a time? Probably not! The funny thing is, this is how you approach designing a space! Fashion and design are very similar in this way, what is the style you are trying to create, and will it work, and function, for the way you are going to use the space…

And lastly, no more impulse buying things on sale. It’s time to start looking at the overall style I’m wanting, and the amount of money I want to spend in a year, and allocating that money on key items that will complement the other things I already own. Just like designing a space. When I look at something for a space, I ask whether it will enhance what’s already there {and your vision for the space}, will it add to the space? And if not I don’t buy it. The same goes for clothes.

I think I’m also going to try doing a capsule wardrobe for a while this year to see how that helps me hone in on my style and figure out what I naturally gravitate to. If you’re curious about what this increasingly popular trend is, I suggest checking out the blog un-fancy. It’s authored by a woman named Caroline who lives in Texas. I love her writing, and the content and her approach are just so authentic you can’t help but fall in love with her and the idea of doing your own capsule wardrobe.

While this isn’t a fashion blog, I wanted to write about this specifically because any area of our life that we aren’t really really owning is probably costing us… sometimes a little… sometimes a lot. And what would things look like if we really owned them? How might our lives look different? I can guarantee that the more you own each are of your life, the more you are able to have. So what are you wanting more of? How much are you currently owning that part of your life, and what would have to change for you to really own it. I’m starting to own my style the way I own creating a space that I love to be in, and I can’t wait to see how it changes things.




One Comment

  1. I feel like this post is very relatable, there’s so many items of clothing I would love to wear and I like the look of though when I’m actually in it, I hate the way I look and the way I feel! Lovely post to read :) x x

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